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How to Survive Gym

Lucy: Gym is the one class CeCee and I have together.

CeCee: Except my gym anxiety is off the charts since I have about as much jock appeal as a stick of celery.

Lucy: Ha-ha-ha-ha! Good one, C.

CeCee: It’s true. I literally have to force myself to participate so I don’t tarnish my GPA.

Lucy: Here we go—the old GPA rears its ugly head again.

CeCee: Anyway, because Lucy is much more athletically inclined than moi, I’m turning this chapter over to her.

Lucy: Thanks, C.—although you’re giving me way too much credit. Okay, it’s not that I’m a muscle-building jockette or anything. It’s just that I don’t mind gym as much as my academic classes. Either way, here are some pointers to get you through the drudgery of Blob Tag and the like:

* Locker room doom. Got the heebies about changing in front of everyone? It seems like a big deal at first, but really, it’s not. Just remember everyone feels weird in his or her underwear. If you’re really sketched out, go to the bathroom and change.

*If you cause your team to get whomped, don’t take it personally if the muscle heads don’t take it well. For some, gym is life and death.

*If you have cramps and your gym teacher is cool, don’t be afraid to tell her. She may give you a pass that day.

*Some gym teachers are sadists and designate certain days for marathons. For example, at Madison Heights, we have Marathon Mondays. If this is your sitch, try to think of something that inspires you while running—like your crush. If possible, listen to some high-octane tune-age on your iPod.

*Make sure to wear good kicks (tennis shoes) for PE. You don’t want to compromise your feet.

*Remember to hydrate. I like to carry a water bottle so I don’t have to drink out of the narsty school fountain.     

*And for everyone’s sake, don’t forget the deodorant!

Try to learn to enjoy gym. At least you get to move around, watch fetch guys show off their (more often than not, nonexistent) muscles, and burn calories all at the same time.               

Gym Must-Haves:

*Workout clothes or school uniform

*At least two pairs of clean gym socks

*One or two pairs of athletic shoes

*Sweatshirt (in case it’s cold)

*Granola bar or something to give you energy

*Deodorant/body spray

*Soap/shampoo/conditioner depending on how much time you’ll have to shower—it varies by school

*Personal hygiene items (just in case)

*A lock

*Bottled water

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What to Read This Summer...

Okay...as you know, I'm not much of a reader.  That's CeCee's terrain.  Even so, I might manage to finish a book or two over the summer.  After all, you can only Facebook so many hours of the day, right?  Anyway, CeCee and I made up this cool list of books.  So, come on tweens - get your read on!!!

LUCY AND CECEE'S
ULTIMATE TWEEN SUMMER READ LIST

1) Coraline - Neil Gaiman

2) The Hunger Games - Suzanne Collins

3) Diary of a Wimpy Kid - Jeff Kinney

4) Animal Farm - George Orwell

5) Hoot - Carl Hiaasen

6) Middle School, The Worst Years of My Life - James Patterson

7) The Outsiders - S.E. Hinton

8) The Best of Roald Dahl - Roald Dahl

9) I Know What You Did Last Summer - Lois Duncan

10) The Catcher in the Rye - J.D. Salinger

11) Stargirl - Jerry Spinelli

12) Holes - Lois Sachar

Say What? How to Talk Tween

Lucy: A-yo. Whatup? Those threads you’re rockin’ are spun, girl! So fetch! Gotta

bizounce. Laters.

CeCee: Translation—Hello. How are you? I really like that shirt you’re wearing. Looks

great. Well, I should get going. See you around.

Lucy: Webster, the dictionary dude, might not recognize tween speak as an official language, but it absolutely, unequivocally is. You dig?

CeCee: That said, be warned—parents and teachers may frown when you’re slinging the slang around. But just remind yourself that talking tween isn’t just a contrived affectation but an absolute necessity. After all, every generation has its own way of talking.

Lucy: Yeah, dude! If, on the other hand, you’re feeling lost in translation and not sure how to make your chatter matter, try listening to the kids around you. With a little practice, your gab will go from drab to fab!

CeCee: Hey—tween speak!

Lucy and CeCee: Here are a few dos and don’ts to remember when talking tween:

L&C’s Talking Tween Tips

* Don’t overdo the coolness factor. You’ll be perceived as trying too hard, which is worse than being perceived as uncool.

*Don’t overdo the Internet acronyms when you talk. A few are acceptable and necessary, but try to limit them to texts, tweets, and the chat room.

*Do sprinkle in cool-sounding vocabulary. Here are some fun, sophisticated words to try:

o   My sister was so uppity today.

o   I don’t know what to do; I’m so conflicted.

o   Camouflage is so passé, don’t you think?

o   Her look is so urbane coming from the city.

 *Do use ironically cool retro words and phrases like “groovy,” “gotta split,” and “far out.” Do use
these tired slang words and phrases sparingly or not at all:        

o   Pad/crib

o   No brainer

o   Da bomb

o   You go, girl

o   My bad

o   Let’s not and say we did

o   Are we having fun yet?

*Do compliment others’ gear with the following:

o   So vintage

o   So retro

o   So Betsey Johnson (or other designer)

o   So crafty

o   So fun

o   So the new black

o   So classic

*Do use the following lines when you’re not really listening:

o   “Shut up right now.”

o   “Grab a rail.”

o   “OMG.”

o   “I’m baffled. Utterly baffled."

The S.M.T. (Super Mean Teacher)

Every middle school has one, which means you’re bound to get them at least once.  Of course, we’re talking about that extraordinarily vile, despicably wicked, supermean teacher.

L&C’s SMT Tips:

♥ Keep a low profile, and stay quiet.

♥ Do all your homework neatly and on time.

♥ The teacher is probably not the joking-around type, so think twice before engaging him or her on a humorous level.

♥ Compliments never hurt. Say that you like his or her tie, shoes, or the inspiring lecture on the downfall of Eastern Bloc Communism.

♥ If it’s around the holiday season, give him or her a card. Buy a generic greeting card just to play it safe unless you happen to know what her or she celebrates (besides the grinch)!

♥ Tell the principal the SMT is your favorite teacher and you get so much out of the class. (He or she will hopefully pass it on, and you’ll get major charm points.)

♥ Volunteer for small missions like passing out or picking up papers. Request to pick up trash after class or erase whiteboards.

♥ Shhhhhh the loud students, telling them you are trying to listen, and they would be wise to do the same.

♥ Participate but don’t ask annoying questions like “Should we put our name on this?” or “What class is this again?”

♥ Take or act like you’re taking copious notes. Teachers like to feel important.

♥ Call the teacher sir, ma’am, or master—but not in a sarcastic way.

Helpful Hint from CeCee: Even I get those supermean ogre-type teachers and grapple with it. What you have to realize is, most of the time, their mean dispositions are nothing personal against you—it’s just the way they’re wired. Also, don’t be worried about being called a “teacher’s pet” by the other kids. You’ll have the last laugh when crowned with an A and everyone else flunks. Just remember—you won’t have these teachers forever. It’s only temporary, so try to figure out what makes them tick, and you’ll have them eating out of the palm of your hand (not literally, of course—gross!).

D.E.A.R. Rocks!!

Hey Tweens -
Have You DEAR'ed Lately?

D.E.A.R. is an educational acronym that stands for Drop Everything and Read.  Only the most cool English teachers will let you D.E.A.R. in class.  If yours doesn't, ask them about it - or bring in this blog post.

This week we'll be celebrating Nashville D.E.A.R. Day at Rose Park Magnet School where we will honor books, authors, and reading in general.  April 12th is the official National D.E.A.R Day.  It is the birthday of the beloved author Beverly Cleary who created one of our all-time favorite childhood characters – Ramona Quimby.  On National D.E.A.R. Day, families are encouraged to read together while promoting books as an integral part of daily life.

So how will you be celebrating D.E.A.R. Day?  Fun activities to do with family, friends, or an impassioned book club include making bookmarks, reading favorite passages, and acting out scenes.  Character charades, anyone?  While April 12th is official D.E.A.R. day, every day is a great day to Drop Everything and Read!  So, turn off that reality show and get your read on!