To Club or Not to Club

Lucy and CeCee: So, you put in a full day at school. Why should you stay after an extra two hours just to be in an extracurricular club? Actually, it turns out we both think clubs are supercool and totally worth the extra time (for different reasons, of course).

Why Clubs Are Cool by CeCee: Clubs are cool because you can hobnob with comrades who have common interests and goals. You can interact with your teachers outside of class and get to know them better. Also, you will come to establish quality traits like social responsibility and leadership skills. By joining a club and becoming involved, you feel more connected to the school community and become a “part” of things.

Why Clubs Are Cool by Lucy: You can meet guys. So, basically, there are three types of clubs: academic, athletic, and social. Some clubs require that you be voted in or try out—like student government or cheerleading—but most just require enthusiasm and willing attitude.

Typical Middle School Clubs:

♥ Mathcounts

♥ Future Problem Solvers

♥ Environmental club

♥ Science olympiad

♥ Spanish/French/German and other foreign language clubs

♥ Sports (basketball, volleyball, softball, gymnastics, football, soccer, etc. )

♥ Debate club

♥ Chess

♥ D&D (Dungeons and Dragons)

♥ Band

♥ Choir

♥ Student council/government

♥ Dance troupe or drill team

♥ Science fiction club

♥ Book club

♥ Cheerleading

♥ School newspaper

Personal Note from CeCee: Don’t shun the academic clubs. Case in point: My math skills and confidence were positively wretched in the sixth grade until I joined Mathcounts. Since then, my grades and test scores have totally improved. Don’t get me wrong—math will never be my favorite subject, but when our Mathcounts team competes against other schools and wins, it’s pure binomial bliss!


Madison Messenger
May Edition, Volume VII, Issue 5
Letter to the Editor

Dear Editor:

It’s time for a fashion face-off with this PTA lady. Why does Mrs. Linda Pringle think she can change the dress code policy at Madison Middle to require uniforms? Students need to express themselves. Everyone knows uniforms are not the great equalizer; they are the great oppressor! Not only that, but establishing a uniform policy is unconstitutional and violates freedom of speech. Also, where is Mrs. Pringle getting all this research claiming uniforms raise test scores? We have so very few rights as middle school students as it is. Why take away our right to fashion?

Sincerely,
Dressed and Oppressed


Dear Dressed and Oppressed,

I certainly appreciate and understand your frustration. I like my fashion freedom, too! Unfortunately, if Mr. Payne, the PTA, and the Madison Heights School Board support the new uniform policy, it will most likely become a reality. That said, I will communicate your concerns and share them with the student body. Until then, flaunt your fashion freedom, and fight on!

Yours in label lust,
Cecelia E. Cruz, Editor in Chief

Addendum

How to Start Your Own Club by Lucy 

I’ve decided to start my own club. It will be an environmental fashion club called the EFC. It’s a fab idea because: 1) it will be a diversion from the whole school uniform thing, and 2) it will make me superpopular.

As president of the EFC, I am quickly learning there are many things one must know before starting his or her own club:

♥ Have at least three people in mind that can help you start the club. Otherwise, you might be viewed as just some weirdo loner with a cause.

♥ Find a club advisor—hopefully a hip, cool teacher with some passion. In other
words, find a teacher who’s not just going to do it for the extra stipend but
can help recruit students and advise when necessary.

♥ Run ideas by the principal and fill out all required forms, including the club
objective, costs, fund-raising, and so on. Tip: Explain to the principal how the club will raise test scores.

♥ Advertise the club with eye-catching posters and homeroom announcements.

♥ Have a set meeting place and agenda.

♥ Serve cookies at meetings. Advertise the fact that cookies will be served.

♥ Make cool club T-shirts to be worn on club days.

Stuff You'll Need:

♥ Meeting place
♥ Plan or club platform
♥ Principal’s approval
♥ Sponsor
♥ Members
♥ Posters
♥ Cookies
♥ Courage and confidence

How NOT to be Noticed in Class

Lucy: Let’s face it. Sometimes, you’d rather not be called on in class.

CeCee: Yeah! Like when you forgot to read that last chapter in English.

Lucy: Or when you have a humungo zit, are laid up with lunch flu, or are just feeling oogly altogether.

Lucy and CeCee: Keeping a low profile takes a little skill, but with practice, you can be present, accounted for, and invisible.

L&C’s How to Go Incognito Tips

♥ Align yourself perfectly with the person sitting in front of you. If sitting in the front row, pretend to take copious notes and/or have head in your textbook.

♥ Hover over your assignment as if highly engaged. Look engrossed, and do not make eye contact with teachers. (They tend to call on students who look at them.) At the same time, nod your head periodically to show you’re paying attention. (Teachers also tend to call on students who are off task.)

♥ A little trick is to answer one question at the beginning of class that’s a no-brainer. This way, your teacher has heard from you and won’t be compelled to call on you again.


Stuff You’ll Need:

♥ Notebook

♥ Text

♥ Pen/pencil

♥ Student in front of you

***Horoscope by Destiny Stars: Brace yourself for drama, drama, drama.***  

Today’s Complexion Report: Mother Nature is on a warpath as mass eruption on chin balloons into a stage-ten runaway zit. Pain factor is off the charts. Until a new clearing front sweeps through, take necessary precautions. Today’s complexion report brought to you by It’s-What’s-Poppin’ Pimple Treatment Gel.

Dear C.C. ~
Whatup, girlie? Just sitting here making myself invisible N history. Did U get the take-home letter today N homeroom? I mean, I really want 2 die. Doesn’t my mother have anything better 2 do than 2 constantly ruin my social life? Kids are already starting 2 come up 2 me ready 2 have it out, and I just lie and say, “No relation.” Of course, no one seems 2 believe me. Some birthday I’m having! (Thanks 4 the balloons, by the way. I heart U!)
2 top off my birthday blues, Josh still hasn’t broken up with that bimbette, Kandi Klass. I just don’t get it. Does she have some kind of voodoo hold on him or something? Is he under hypnosis?
Anywayz, I hope U don’t mind me asking—but do U feel okay? U just seem kinda tired and worn out lately, and U never eat anything except those Twizzler Nibs. Just making sure you’re not turning N-2 one of those rib-counting chicks. Don’t get me wrong—U still look fly, and I love your new Mary Jane platforms. But just sayin’. U know I’m here if U want 2 talk about anything, right?

Hearts and daisy petals,
Lucy

PS Not that I have 2 say anything, but please don’t publish anything about the uniform policy N the Madison Messenger. It’ll just get everyone all trippy and Kandi Klass & Co. is already sending me toxic hate vibes.
L8R



Tonight’s Homework:
None—feeling too wrathful to focus
Call Chase

Secret Thoughts After Reading Lucy’s Note

I don’t care if it’s her birthday or not—I think I might be seriously enraged with Lucy! First of all, what right does she have asking me not to publish something in the Madison Messenger? The uniform policy is serious school news, and she knows that! As editor, it is my duty is to observe, investigate, and report—all conflicts of interest aside. Sometimes, she’s dumber than a box of rocks!
And then, she has the audacity to inquire about my dietary proclivities. Maybe she should worry about herself for a change! What business is it of hers if I’m not eating? Frankly, she could stand to lose a few LBs! Maybe then she’d get a boyfriend. Speaking of—if I hear one more time about her fauxlationship with Josh Land, I think I’m going to lose it! It’s so irritating! But honestly—maybe this is about other things … I don’t usually get so peevish with Lucy, even when she’s acting like an überditz.
I wish I could talk to someone about my inner turmoil. I tried asking Cora about boys last night, but she only pretended to listen, and now that she’s made cheerleader, she’s way too preoccupied for anything else—most especially her dorky little sister.
Why is life soooo confusing? Where is the clarity? Where is my magical advisor?
Oh, moons of madness!

CeCee

Passion for Fashion

Well, it's that time of year, when your parents, grandparents, and bizarro aunts and uncles will be asking what's on your wish list.  In other words, it's the perfect time to pursue your passion for fashion - right?

I’m as shy as they come, but when it comes to my day-to-day threads, I’m a bold, fearless fashionista. I guess you could classify my look as boho chic laced with a few punked-out accessories. I know, I know—it totally goes against the bespectacled nerd-girl concept, but that’s the brilliant thing about fashion—it expresses the wild child within and makes my gear buzzworthy! (I actually attribute my edgy trend tastes back to my Catholic school days when the required oxford blouse, plaid skirt, and rosary beads forced me to think outside the box.)

Now, the thing about fashion is you really don’t have to break the bank to be swank. Except for the occasional babysitting or tutoring job, I don’t have a big cash stash myself but still manage to throw together clever little ensembles. Sure, I shop at Abercrombie and Gap like the rest of the masses, but I also find a lot of spunky stuff (belts, purses, military jackets, etc.) at the Goodwill and other thrift stores. So yeah— it’s okay to get a little daring—especially when it comes to the trimmings. And yes, you’ll get an occasional eye roll or a mumbled snarl from the SMGs (Supermean Girls), but they’re probably just jealous because you’re rockin’ it and they’re not. After all, no one respects an Aberzombie clone who’s just following the trendies!


How to Rock It Hip Tips:
♥ Accessories rule
♥ Wear a pair of Chucks with a scarf
♥ Layers, layers, layers
♥ Try a low-slung, chunky belt
♥ Enhance any outfit with vintage jewelry and/or dangly chandelier earrings—love that stuffy Victorian bling!
♥ Mix and match colors and patterns—but sparingly
♥ Rock a mini with leggings and flats

Fashion Don’ts
I don’t believe in the fashion police, but there are a few no-no’s everyone should adhere to for the sake of mankind and world peace. In my honest and humble opinion, the following are universal fashion flubs (i.e., not a good look for anyone):

♥ Acid-washed jeans
♥ Ruffles
♥ Heels you can’t walk in
♥ Black lipstick
♥ Yellow
♥ Too-low lowriders
♥ Fishnet
♥ Shoulder pads
♥ Thong peek-a-boos
♥ Hairy legs with skirts or shorts

Remember:
1) Stay clear of sheer
2) If it doesn’t fit, it’s gonna split
3) Too bright ain’t right
4) If you wear it, rock it!


As a bonus, I'm including my Back-to-School Shopping List:

1. Black leggings
2. Platforms in any color
3. Flared denim jeans
4. Black skinny jeans
5. Faux-leather tote
6. Mary Janes
7. Denim vest
8. Burgundy glam-punk blazer
9. Neon pink Chuck Taylors
10. Strategically ripped vintage concert tees
11. Gypsy broom skirt
12. Chandelier and hoop earrings
13. Lace-up combat boots
14. Gold and silver bangles
15. Purple knit beret
16. Black trapeze dress
17. Flannel tunic
18. Granny cardigan

(The trick is to strike a balance between the trends and classics, sprinkled with your own personal touches.)

Scary Sitch: Know your fashion limits and the school dress code policy. Once, during my Catholic school days, I tied my white oxford into a navel-knot halter à la Britney Spears, got five demerits, three Hail Marys, and a lecture from Sister Eugenie on the virtues of modesty. Yikes!

Love,
CeCee

What's With Homeroom???

Lucy: You’ll most likely start your middle school day with homeroom, which is kind of like your home base at school.

CeCee: And, while its official purpose is for the teacher to take attendance and the principal to make school-wide announcements—

Lucy: Most students sleep, talk, or scramble to finish their homework.

CeCee: You probably won’t get a grade in homeroom, but it’s a useful time to organize your day. Usually, announcements are broadcasted on an intercom or television. It may be tempting to tune out or talk to your neighbor, but don’t.

Lucy: Why not?

CeCee: Because you can learn about important school activities like dances, pep rallies, and club tryouts.

Lucy: Thrillage!

CeCee: Homeroom teachers are usually pretty cool because they don’t have to teach or grade papers during that time, so if you have questions, ask them!

Lucy and CeCee: Below are our respective helpful hints (in obvious rank contrast to one another) to help you cruise through homeroom.


Helpful Hint from CeCee: Use homeroom to your advantage by calendaring assignments and looking over anything that’s due that day. Also, it’s an ideal time to ask to use the bathroom and read stall scrawl.

Helpful Hint from Lucy: Use homeroom to catch up on social correspondence or to tweak your action plan for snagging that hottie crush. Also, it’s a great time to ask to use the bathroom and read stall scrawl.

The Sleepover

Lucy: Sleepovers are a great way to bond with your besties.

CeCee: And, there are basically two types—

Lucy: Wild and superwild.

CeCee: We like the latter, but either one can be blastworthy.

Lucy: And, don’t let the name fool you. If it’s a classic, hardly anyone gets any sleep at a sleepover!

Lucy and CeCee: Here is a list of our classic sleepover activities.

L&C’s Classic Sleepover Activities

♥ Freeze the bras of girls who go to bed first 

♥ Have a horror-movie-fest

♥ Give manis/pedis

♥ Give makeovers

♥ Have an old-fashioned pillow fight

♥ Play Truth or Dare

♥ Play “Would You Rather …?” 

♥ Have a foodfest*

♥ Make crank calls 

*Food is a vital part of the sleepover. After all, how will you stay up all night without the proper sustenance? Pizza with the works is an obvious and safe choice. Other yum-o options are tacos, hot dogs, and build-your-own sub sandwiches. Snack food should include popcorn, assorted candies, pretzels, chips ’n’ dip, and the like. Fun dessert ideas are making cupcakes, brownies, or having an ice cream sundae bar. And, don’t forget the next morning. If you’re a hostess with the mostest, you’ll send your besties off with a full stomach. Ask your mom if she doesn’t mind making pancakes or at least buying some sort of doughnuts or pastries.


Beware: If you’re a pranker-cranker, make sure to dial *67 first or call on a private line. We don’t recommend calling your teachers. Boys and extremely annoying people are all fair game—but never be mean! Also, cruel pranks should be avoided. This includes laxatives in the soda, dunking hands in warm water (doesn’t really work anyway), and shaving eyebrows or other body parts. Remember, what happens at a sleepover stays at a sleepover!


Helpful Hint: Don't be too loud. Not only will it irritate your parents, but they could become suspicious and check things out for themselves. Also, don't let your friends be a slob mob! If your besties leave and it looks like a tornado hit, encourage your BFF to stick around and help you clean up. This way, your mom won’t freak and vow never to allow any future sleepovers. Also, be sure to thank your parents for letting you throw your bash. Parents love to be appreciated!

Stuff You’ll Need:

♥ Your six to eight best besties (this is the ideal size; any more and it gets a little crazy)
♥ Lots of junk food
♥ Scary movies (ask before you can get the R-rated kind.)
♥ Sleeping bag/pillow
♥ Barf bag or bowl since someone always overdoes it on the junk food
♥ Makeup and spa materials
♥ Cell phone for crank call and documentation purposes
♥ Extra pillows, blankets
♥ Freezer


***Sleepover parties are cool, but sometimes it’s nice just to hang out with your bestie—which is when you have a bestie sleepover.***

Lucy and CeCee’s Sleepover Agenda

1) Organized Lucy’s Life Science notes as promised (approximate time allotted—seven minutes)
2) Discussed the art of kissing; practiced with pillows
3) Watched Twilight for the millionth time; analyzed pertinent Bella/Edward scenes
4) Painted toes
5) Danced to Black Eyed Peas
6) Made BFF picture frames
7) Picked up phone; listened to Lilly’s convo with Cora
8) Chugged soda; had burping contest
9) Made friendship bracelets
10) Updated BFF scrapbook
11) Feasted on Lacey’s Girl Scout cookies (at least Lucy did); CeCee watched as Lucy lapsed into temporary sugar coma
12) Dialed *67; called Josh Land twice—hung up twice
13) Picked up phone; listened to Lilly’s convo with Carson
14) Spied on Lilly, who journaled listening to John Mayer and then cried
15) Went through school yearbook; commented on entire class
16) Went through school yearbook; commented on entire faculty
17) Dialed *67; called Principal Payne to discuss uniform policy anonymously; hung up when wife answered
18) Perused through Seventeen and CosmoGIRL to take all quizzes; shared answers
19) Played game of “Would You Rather …?”
20) Googled “chest-building exercises” and did them
21) Made popcorn, burned it, threw it away
22) Washed faces, didn’t brush teeth, went to bed …

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How to Survive Gym

Lucy: Gym is the one class CeCee and I have together.

CeCee: Except my gym anxiety is off the charts since I have about as much jock appeal as a stick of celery.

Lucy: Ha-ha-ha-ha! Good one, C.

CeCee: It’s true. I literally have to force myself to participate so I don’t tarnish my GPA.

Lucy: Here we go—the old GPA rears its ugly head again.

CeCee: Anyway, because Lucy is much more athletically inclined than moi, I’m turning this chapter over to her.

Lucy: Thanks, C.—although you’re giving me way too much credit. Okay, it’s not that I’m a muscle-building jockette or anything. It’s just that I don’t mind gym as much as my academic classes. Either way, here are some pointers to get you through the drudgery of Blob Tag and the like:

* Locker room doom. Got the heebies about changing in front of everyone? It seems like a big deal at first, but really, it’s not. Just remember everyone feels weird in his or her underwear. If you’re really sketched out, go to the bathroom and change.

*If you cause your team to get whomped, don’t take it personally if the muscle heads don’t take it well. For some, gym is life and death.

*If you have cramps and your gym teacher is cool, don’t be afraid to tell her. She may give you a pass that day.

*Some gym teachers are sadists and designate certain days for marathons. For example, at Madison Heights, we have Marathon Mondays. If this is your sitch, try to think of something that inspires you while running—like your crush. If possible, listen to some high-octane tune-age on your iPod.

*Make sure to wear good kicks (tennis shoes) for PE. You don’t want to compromise your feet.

*Remember to hydrate. I like to carry a water bottle so I don’t have to drink out of the narsty school fountain.     

*And for everyone’s sake, don’t forget the deodorant!

Try to learn to enjoy gym. At least you get to move around, watch fetch guys show off their (more often than not, nonexistent) muscles, and burn calories all at the same time.               

Gym Must-Haves:

*Workout clothes or school uniform

*At least two pairs of clean gym socks

*One or two pairs of athletic shoes

*Sweatshirt (in case it’s cold)

*Granola bar or something to give you energy

*Deodorant/body spray

*Soap/shampoo/conditioner depending on how much time you’ll have to shower—it varies by school

*Personal hygiene items (just in case)

*A lock

*Bottled water